a situation where you have no idea how you end up there

20 Jul 2016

the interview


Last couple months, i'm trying so hard to make a good post. I'm trying really hard to post more words than pictures. I wanna write something that matter, something like #BlackLivesMatter, or the attack on Istanbul airport, or about Melania Trump plagiarized Michelle Obama's speech. Something that worth your time to read. We all know being a writer (any type of writer) isn't that easy.

So here we go.

Have you ever been in a situation where you have no idea how you end up there? Like how did you become best friend with your best friend? or how did you even know about Facebook at the first place? or how you stop watching Power Rangers when you were a kid?

I remember it was mid 2009. My chairmate, an alternative-rock enthusiast, having this music-related conversation with another boy that sat behind us, I remembered trying to join in with saying that I like Greenday (since i only know that one) and they were like “Boo, Greengay! they sucks.”

That was like a slap in the face. I shut up. But i remembered they once mention about Arctic Monkey. Going home, in order to be fit in (yeah, i was that pathetic) i downloaded the Arctic Monkeys songs. Three songs of them.
+ The view from aftenoon (check out the MV, reminds me of Whiplash! HAH!)

At that time, songs on my phone either HSM ost or Taylor Swift or Justin Bieber’s first single, BABY. So can you even imagine how my reaction is when I heard those songs.

It freaking hurt my ears at that time. So i delete it.

On 2011, i move to Bogor. One of my classmate, Sapi, saw my playlist then laughed. "ew disney.." she said. She told me that i should hear ARTTM. So i did. Since that i started paying attention to any other bands, trying to evolve my playlist. I remembered how hype i was about The Killers. I also remembered seeing All Time Low on MTV. I started diggin’ them and guess what, my ears didn't hurt from listening to their song. HAH.

Then one day my classmates discussed about whose band has the best drummer. Someone said, Arctic Monkey. BOOM. My brain relive those 2009 memory.

The next thing i know, when i got home i tried to listening to arctic monkey. 
Their songs started to make sense.

Now its 11pm on 19th of July 2016, and here i am crying over this.


Fun things i found on internet when i wrote this :
- Kurt Cobain's suicide note. I. just. can't.
- Oh how i love when people analyses art with a logical thinking, a writing about Alex Turner's voice 

Ps : not a big fan of arctic monkeys, just tryin to track down how i end up listening to their song


The art of being alone

30 Apr 2016

Nighthawks by Edward Hopper


Call me a laggard but the truth is I just discover how to use podcast on iPhone....

and God knows how joyful I am to ever discovering this podcast and stuff.  There's a lot of superb podcast channel out there, but my current favourite is 99% Invisible. I've been listening to their podcast almost every morning during my walk to campus! I see myself as a "visual" person than an "audio" person. Among the 4 basic communication skills, listening is the most difficult one for me. So listening to podcast really helps me improving my listening skill.

Also, I kinda wonder why podcast isn't that popular in Indonesia.

Anyway, last week I listened to The guardian's podcast, who interview Olivia Laing (the author of The Lonely City: Adventures in the Art of Being Alone). They talked about the connection between isolation and creativity. Its such a good podcast, that inspires me to wrote this post.

And the book itself talks about how Olivia Laing explore the lonely city (re: New Yorkby way of art. Its so cool, how the loneliness can affect some artist's works (from Edward Hopper's Nighthawks to Andy Warhol's Time Capsules, from Henry Darger's hoarding to David Wojnarowicz's AIDS activism) and suggest we should all be a little less frightened of being alone.

From what I experienced, we live in a society where children raised to be social and make many friends. Then they grew up thinking that "alone" is associated with "shame", "anti-social" and "unwanted". As a proud introvert, its actually irritating for me being with people that fear of being alone. People needs to understand the difference between being alone and being lonely. Even one says that lonely itself have two different reasons, because the lack of intimacy with human being or because the lack of connection with like-minded person.


Agnes Martin, an American minimalist-abstract painter, once said that 
"The best things in life happen to you when you're alone."

I've read somewhere, that there is a term called "Spotlight Effect", it refers to the tendency for individuals to think that others are observing them more closely than they actually are. Based on the research, people actually aren’t paying as close of attention to your appearance and actions as you are because they are too busy paying attention to themselves. I mean like, maybe you're the only one that realise you're having a bad hair day or your shirt is the wrong size. 

So the next time you're walking the wrong direction, no need pretending to check your phone before turning around. 
Because less likely people see that.

My "GoT Season 6" Excpectations

23 Apr 2016





My plan was to make it on After Effects, but seems like the universe doesn't like that plan. My AE suddenly keeps quitting every time I open it. So I used photoshop, and the quality is super crappy omg.

On Season 6, I wish :
  • Hodor never leaves Bran
  • Sir Jorah Mormont dies. His life is so sad, i can't bear it
  • Ramsay Bolton dies poisoned by Varys
  • Jon Snow finally knows something (if he still alive)
  • Theon Greyjoy survives and marry Margery Tyrell for political purpose (Go Reek!)
  • Jaime leaves Cersei and joins the night's watch
  • A man turns out to be gay. A man doesn't need woman.
  • Tyrion make an alliance with Daenerys, and together win the iron thrones. Then wait until someone ruins it :)

UPDATED (SPOILER ALERT. Season 6 was finished *sigh)
  • Rest in peace my hero!
  • Well, Sir Jorah hasn't die.... yet
  • HOORAY!!!!
  • KING IN THE NORTH!
  • I like the fact that Greyjoy and Tyrell made an ally with The Targaeryn
  • WTF. Freaking Mad Queen!
  • A man said goodbye to Arya Stark from Winterfell
  • can't wait for the next season!

Credit : All characters illustration made by Jerry Liu Studio


Feb '16

11 Apr 2016



First of all, hi hello there. 
Second of all, honestly I do have a lot of stuff i wanna blogged about, there are literally like 15 posts on my draft. The thing is every time  i got an idea then i started to write them down, idk why but it always end up with me struggling with the words or me being a fantastic procrastinator. Ugh.
And last, here is a vlog from last February (i know, i know, its 2 months ago, i know).